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Mystical Perfection

mystical perfection

The only thing mystifying here is how anyone could think this was anywhere near perfection...

20 Comments
  1. M. Bubba Blume says:

    Come on. This can't be real.

       2 likes

  2. M. Bubba Blume says:

    Crap. It is. Just went to the website.

       0 likes

    • Cat says:

      I can't believe they are allowed to exist on the internet. And I can't believe people obviously request their work. -_- The giant parrot on cock beach killed me.

         2 likes

  3. Cat says:

    This hurts my soul.

       0 likes

  4. Kristian says:

    Wow! I went to their website and looked through the gallery and a list of their services. Here's one of my favorites and it's only $250!

    "Corporate
    With all corporate advertising you need to look you’re best, first impression do count.
    Your physical appearance will impact on your first impression
    We will assist you to create the first impression the right impression the first time."

       3 likes

  5. GingerSnap says:

    Does anyone realize the first picture in the gallery is singer Jewel?

       1 likes

    • Grackle says:

      Haha, I thought you were kidding!

      They call her "Mandy", apparently. Completely and utterly bizarre.

         0 likes

  6. Ali C says:

    It frightens me that this is real and they actually charge people 250$ for junk...wtf??

       0 likes

  7. Leah says:

    Dear lord!! I looked at the photo gallery on their website and all I can say is they made nice looking people look like a Barbie gone wrong with their photoshopped plastic skin and hooker make-up.... Just because you have Photoshop doesn't mean you have to mutilate photos with your sub-par skills!!

       0 likes

  8. Peace says:

    I like how they used the Cheeto android look for the retouch. It's that classy touch that makes them the professionals they are.

       0 likes

  9. Mari says:

    That's ghastly! I just looked at their website and they have a script type font for their text - very hard to read! Clearly they know a lot about design...

       0 likes

  10. Peace says:

    I took a look at the site, and I am sincerely hoping somebody made it as a joke. It has to be a joke. Seriously. I'm begging for it to be a joke. Please?

       2 likes

  11. ithurtswhenipee says:

    This HAS to be a joke. We have seen some pretty ridiculous photos here from fauxtogs, but at least you can say that they are actually trying. This website can be summed up by: heavy Gaussian blur over everything except the eyes and mouth (except for the one where everything but the hair is blurred), neon green irises accompanied by neon lips, teeth and eye whites pushed all the way to 255.255.255 at 100% fill and opacity, a parrot. There is even some perfectly adequate stolen pictures that were destroyed by Gaussian blur and vignette. No way this is a serious website.

       1 likes

  12. Joe says:

    OMG! If the work itself wasn't bad enough, they are editing pictures someone else has taken and posted to adult websites! Look at the watermarks on some of the "before" shots. allover30.com? Onlytease.com? And what's with the squishing of the photos? Attempt to make the people look skinnier? Lame...

       1 likes

  13. Glen says:

    On the site they spell photography "photograhy"

    And I love this one "Guarantees that all e-mail addresses and photos are healed in the strictest confederacy"

    Another one:
    "Mystical Perfection Tip’s:

    Consider viewing, fashion magazines
    Viewing modals stance, appearance"

    And finally

    "Family portraits
    Brining together a number of family members to one canvas form a number of photos.
    Joining together of adoring family members who have departed from us "

       2 likes

  14. Grackle says:

    The example chosen for YNGD is actually one of the best of the bunch. That photo gallery!!!

       0 likes

  15. Forgetthisname says:

    The best one, is in the gallery, numbers 13 and 14, the lady with braces. I..I have no words! I mean, her two front teeth are on the side of her mouth! How?! How the hell do you do that and think it looks good?!

    Knowing someone is getting paid for this junk makes me want to curl up in fetal position and never come out into the daylight ever!

       1 likes

  16. nomi17 says:

    notice how they changed the skin tone on her chest but completely forgot her arm??? I browsed through their "gallery" and with every click I was mortified... obviously they are "stealing" pics from sites and "improving on them? If they had an inkling of intelligence they would at least remove the watermarks from the photos the snatch to destroy...

       0 likes